PINCH ME: These are no ordinary times. Last week, the oldest, biggest tablets bearing the Ten Commandments — the moral code for Western civilization — were auctioned off for a mere $850,000. The tablets, made of marble and weighing 115 pounds, were roughly 1,800 years old. Conspicuously missing from the stone inscription, however, were the commandment against taking the Lord’s name in vain.
Goddamn!
Later last week, the sparkling, sequined dress into which tragic sex icon Marilyn Monroe was surgically infused while she famously sang — all heat and humidity — “Happy Birthday, Mr. President” to then-president John F. Kennedy one year before he was assassinated, was auctioned off for $4.8 million.