SMOKE SIGNALS: Once a year, around Christmas, my father and I would huddle under the eaves of the garage to smoke a ceremonial cigar. As rituals went, it was sweet but awkward. My father — having played a significant role in bringing nine children into the world — was not merely comfortable with long silences; he relished them. So mostly we just smoked. And also spat. Quite a bit. By then, my father had reached the age of acceptance when it came to farts that happened to sneak out. After one such escape, he broke his customary silence to explain how the phrase “to be hoisted by one’s petard” literally meant to be knocked off one’s feet by the force of one’s flatulence. A devout Catholic, my father knew his Latin. The word “petard,” he explained, meant “fart” back around the year 900 and shares the same root meaning as the word “petroleum.”
Watching Exxon and the enviros duking it out this Tuesday in front of the county supervisors, I found myself squinting at remembrances of cigar smoke puffed with my father some 30 years ago.
Spoiler alert: Santa Barbara enviros won and Exxon lost in a tie vote. With Supervisor Joan Hartmann having to recuse herself because of a conflict of interest, the remaining supes found themselves terminally deadlocked. Technically, that means no action got taken. Practically speaking, it meant no dice for Exxon, at least for the time being.